Show: The humble Farmer

Episode: humble 2014 0302


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Episode Description:

Synopsis of The humble Farmer TV show for March 2, 2014

Thank you for looking at a program called “Greed.” humble saves a lot of money by using solar energy which is free.

56 minutes. This show includes a 4.14 minute clip of Denny Breau playing guitar.

Although The humble Farmer is just as contrived as any reality show, here you will see no overweight people with tattoos pretending to repossess automobiles or emaciated wealthy models getting a massage.

Well received in Northern New England as a radio show for 35 years, this is the same old fashioned music and humorous social commentary show that has delighted young and old alike every week since April 6, 1978 for radio --- and now for television.

Much of the video over the music is of humble building and installing his solar photo electric panels and his solar water heaters.

Music is by: Clark Terry, Sonny Stitt, Joe Venuti, Count Basie, Errol Garner, Spike Jones, Lee Morse and Denny Breau.

Tame fare, you say, for viewers expecting someone to be shot, arrested or blown up.

The show is tightly scripted. It starts out with humble putting solar panels on his house. The show ends, as usual, with the Keystone Cops driving a car off the end of a dock.
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The humorous and/or informative commentary that humble delivers between the songs is approximated below:
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1. Ever hear of the ICLEI? We read that the ICLEI is an international association of local governments and national and regional local government organizations that have made a commitment to sustainable development. Doesn't sustainable development sound rather frightening? Ominous? Couldn’t sustainable development be another way of saying more profit-killing government regulations? Another word for sustainable development might be zoning. If zoning is carried to its extreme here in Knox County, in 100 years one still might be able to find in Knox County a field large enough to pasture a cow, or an acre of carefully managed forest. So don't talk to me about a sustainable environment. Can you imagine how corporate America would stagger if every rural house in the U. S. had solar panels on the roof that provided that household with free electricity from the sun? And more solar panels on the garage that provided that household with free hot water from the sun? When you start talking about electricity and hot water being doled out by the sun without someone making a profit, doesn’t it sound like socialism to you? And doesn’t just thinking about it make the chills run right up and down your spine? Doesn't the fact that the ICLEI is an international organization --- as is the United Nations --- raise a red flag? --- With a hammer and sickle on it? I don't know about you, but it gives me the creeps to think that (clouded in secrecy) there might be an international organization out there committed to sustainable development that is trying to keep honest American businessmen from making a fast buck.
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2. Winky and his wife were getting ready for bed. She was standing in front of a full length mirror looking at herself. "You know ," she says, "I look in the mirror and I see an old woman. My face is all wrinkled, I’m too skinny. I’m nothing but skin and bones. I’m a homely old woman. Quick, tell me something good to make me feel better about myself" Winky says, “well......there's nothing wrong with your eyesight".
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3. If you’ve driven Route 131 between Thomaston and my house you’ve been past the old green Finnish schoolhouse where Gary Akers now has his art gallery. When I tell you that I went to one of Gary’s shows, I don’t want you to think that it was for the free food, because there was nothing there that an old Maine man would eat. Who should I see there appreciating art but Gerry Colson from South Casco. And Gerry admitted that he listens to this program and that he loves to go to Monhegan. So Gerry and I have one thing in common. But Gary Akers is a crafty artist and I like his stuff even more because he paints things that everybody can recognize, like the houses in Port Clyde or the lighthouse on Southern Island. But I was talking about Gary’s art show and the people who were there. Can you tell me why the only people with money enough to buy first class paintings seem to be attracted by tiny tomatoes wrapped in bacon or spinach sandwiches?
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4. You probably heard about the man who has been trapped at Charles de Gaulle Airport since 1988. His passport got messed up so he can’t enter France and yet he is unable to leave it. It was written up in the newspaper because the reporter thought it was such a strange and unusual thing. But if you compare this unfortunate fellow to a man who doesn’t get along with his wife, yet has six kids so they can’t afford a divorce, we could probably find several hundred similar cases right here in Maine.
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5. If you think about it, a lot of road rage could probably be blamed on a condition called hypoglycemia which means that some people snap quickly and get mad and do nutty things if they don’t eat on a regular basis. By that I mean every 3 hours. I was over 40 before I learned that if I ate on a regular basis, or every 3 hours, the chemistry in my brain would be well balanced and I wouldn’t have these little senseless rage attacks, like a spoiled child, when things didn’t go just the way I wanted. Are there some people you don’t even dare talk to until they’ve had a good meal? They go wild over nothing. You know it. You live with it. You know that when they’re hungry no matter what you say they’ll start an argument or snap at you. You know who they are. Point at one of them right now. Feed them.
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6. Did you hear that Congress is going to put a stop to the incessant amount of sex and violence we see on television? I don’t know about you, but I’ll miss the evening news.
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7. I just bought a book called Frog and Toad Are Friends. It is a book written by a very good and talented man whose name was Arnold Lobel and I bought it because I recall enjoying Frog and Toad Are Friends back when I was very young, probably in my mid thirties. But now, thirty years later and hopefully a more discriminating reader, I found a couple of disturbing things. To get an exhausted Toad out of bed after only half a winter’s nap, Frog tears the February, March and April pages off Toad’s calendar. Seeing May on his calendar Toad thinks that spring has arrived, gets out of bed, and goes for a walk with the crafty Frog. The message to young people is clear: if your friends will not listen to reason, you can get your own way by employing deceit. Not that Toad himself would be able to cast the first stone, because when he couldn’t find his button he jumped up and down and screamed. Do you want your youngsters to learn that a temper tantrum is an acceptable response to frustration? However, on the positive side of Frog and Toad Are Friends, your children will preview the shameful reality we live with in the United States today, because when Frog mailed his next door neighbor a letter, Toad didn’t get it until four days later.
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8. You've heard about body language --- that you can tell what a person is thinking by the way they stand. The body language experts will tell you that anyone who has his arms folded across his chest is aloof and uncommunicative. That might be true in Boston, but on the street in Rockland, Maine it could mean that you slopped clam chowder on your sweater.
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9. My wife Marsha, The Almost Perfect Woman, has brown eyes. She is not old enough to know the song, Beautiful Beautiful Brown Eyes which I sang to her the other day. Chorus: Beautiful, beautiful brown eyes, Beautiful, beautiful brown eyes, Beautiful, beautiful brown eyes, I'll never love blue eyes again. Willie, oh Willie, I love you, Love you with all my heart; Tomorrow we might have been married, But liquor has kept us apart. Seven long years I've been married, I wish I was single again; A woman never knows of her troubles, Until she has married a man. Down to the barroom he staggered, Staggered and fell at the door; The last words that he ever uttered, "I'll never get drunk any more." You might find it interesting to learn that I found the words to this song on an Arkansas Family Tradition Web Site.
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10. When my wife Marsha, The almost Perfect Woman, came home from work and got out of her car, I greeted her in the dooryard. I was all excited. I said, “Mike has written a movie and if, by any chance, he is able to sell it, he wants me to narrate some of it because he needs a real Maine accent.” Marsha said, “Can you fake it?”
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Thank you for considering The humble Farmer. Have fun.

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Total SD Episode Video Runtime (hh:mm:ss): 00:55:56

File Size of SD Episode Video: 2,660,673,540 Bytes

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Date SD Episode Video Uploaded: Sunday, March 9, 2014 - 19:42


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