Show: The humble Farmer

Episode: humble 2012 0304.mpg

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Episode Description:

Well received in Northern New England for over 30 years, this is the same old fashioned music and humorous social commentary show that has delighted young and old alike every week since April 6, 1978 for radio --- and now for television.

Music by: Clark Terry, Coleman Hawkins, Stephane Grappelli, and Denny Breau.

This show contains 3.01 minutes of Denny Breau playing guitar and a few seconds of Indiana farmer Darrell Grogan telling a story about life in Indiana many years ago.

This week humble is joined on camera by his young friend, Sylvia, whose smile might well enable her to soon seize control of the entire show.

The video over the music is Darrell Grogan’s Valentine’s Day parade and some footage from the old car show at Fort Meade, Florida. Tame fare, indeed, for viewers expecting someone to be shot, arrested or blown up.

The show is tightly scripted. It starts out with a clip of suggestions to improve the show and ends, as usual, with the Keystone Cops driving a car off the end of a dock.

Here's the approximate humorous commentary for The humble Farmer show for the week of March 4, 2012.
1. Next week I'm scheduled for a nerve test in my feet. In reading the directions just now I notice that it says "1. Please wear shorts or a skirt for the test." Because I can’t find a pair of shorts I have no choice but to wear one of my wife's skirts. Yes, I could carry a bagpipe so I don’t feel foolish. After all, I am a full 1/4 Scottish. Which reminds me that my grandmother, whose parents were born in Aberdeen, used to sing this song: “There was a bonny Scotsman who fought at Waterloo. The wind blew up his kiltie, and I don’t know what happened then.”
2. Wouldn’t you think it would be rather presumptuous of me to die from a drug overdose? After all, I’m not famous.
4. One afternoon my wife Marsha and I went to a funeral. When we left I said, “When I die, I do not want people to have a Celebration of My Life. There will be no celebration of my life. I want a funeral.” Marsha said, “I wasn’t planning on doing anything.”
5. There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
7. Some people hoping to control their small children are warned about a fictitious character named the Boogey Man. Some people hoping to control illiterate and untraveled Americans warn them about a Boogey man called taxes. There are people in Africa who are much like the biggest corporations in America in that they pay no taxes. Not enough Americans know that in Northern Europe where taxes are high, people have great healthcare, and great educations. Everything else that makes up a good lifestyle follows high taxes, great healthcare and great educations. In some countries where taxes are low, people are living on muddy hillsides in tin and cardboard shacks. So --- please remember: It’s not what you earn or how much of your income goes for taxes --- it’s what kind of a lifestyle you have when you have worked for a year and look around you. I’m not hungry, I’m able to make my monthly mortgage payment, I have most of my teeth, I don’t earn enough to pay an income tax, and thanks to a couple of generous friends I now have solar radiant heat in my cellar. So I’m way ahead of millions of Americans who lost their homes and are on the street. In the US people are defined by income. They should be defined by lifestyle. I’m very satisfied with my lifestyle. I do have to admit that my lifestyle would be noticibly better if I earned a million dollars a year and gave up 95 percent of it in taxes.
9. Winky was working at the airport baggage area, when a woman came over to the counter and said that her bags never showed up. Winky said, "Has your plane arrived yet?"
10. Please listen closely because I’m about to say something that might make your life easier. You know that I could never afford to have children. But when I married the widow Marsha VanZandbergen she had two wonderful daughters. And now my wife Marsha, The Almost Perfect Woman, has three grandchildren. When the oldest one turned six, although they live in Fort Kent way up by the Canadian border, they drove five hours to get to our farm because the child wanted to celebrate her birthday here with us. I was out in the barn working on my hot water solar collectors during the party, but looked up often enough to notice that the dooryard was full of cars. You know how gobs of cake and partially masticated cookies get ground into the floor at these things, so you can believe that I rushed right in to vacuum up the mess as soon as they were gone. And here is the tip that could save you a lot of bother: At this party --- not one crumb on the floor. Someone had brought a dog.
11. You have certainly heard that ten thousand years ago people were just as smart as we are now. You might say that is a terrible thing to wish upon a primitive society, but I read it in a magazine so it must be true. Back then if someone had something you wanted, you’d kill them and take it. I suppose that’s the main difference between a primitive and a civilized society.
Thank you for considering The humble Farmer.

Episode Short Description: N/A

Downloads of This Episode:

[SD File Downloads]: 12

[HD File Downloads]: 0

[Total File Downloads]: 12


SD (Standard Definition) File

File Name of SD Episode: 2012 0304.mpg

Total SD Episode Video Runtime (hh:mm:ss): 00:55:56

File Size of SD Episode Video: 2,638,466,924 Bytes

Resolution of SD Episode Video: 720x480

Date SD Episode Video Uploaded: Wednesday, February 29, 2012 - 12:27

HD (High Definition) File

This episode has not been uploaded by the producer in HD format and is not available for download.

If you wish to have HD format, you can private message a request to the show's producer at The humble Farmer.